


Five Reasons

by betsybo



Series: Mix Up [3]
Category: Bad News (Comic Strip Presents...), The Comic Strip Presents..., The Young Ones (TV 1982)
Genre: Angst, Crossover, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Not much plot, Reconciliation, mentions of crossover pairings, mentions of unrequited love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-08
Updated: 2018-09-08
Packaged: 2019-07-08 14:30:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15932378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/betsybo/pseuds/betsybo
Summary: November, 1987Colin couldn't play the bass to save his life, but Vim always had his own reasons for keeping him in the band. He had five reasons, to be exact.Or:Vim makes an effort to fix things with Colin after the disastrous 'Monsters of Rock' concert.





	Five Reasons

**Author's Note:**

> This is set over a year after 'Keeping'. This fic doesn’t crossover directly with The Young Ones, as 'Keeping' did with Bad News. Rick and Vyvyan do not make an appearance but they are mentioned. Again, there are direct spoilers for both Bad News films here, and it will make more sense if you read the first two installations of the series. Enjoy!

Colin couldn't play the bass to save his life, but Vim always had his own reasons for keeping him in the band. He had five reasons, to be exact.

 

1.

 

Colin’s brother had his own PA system, and he had always been happy enough to let them use it.

 

It was this fact that had sealed the deal for Vim when Colin auditioned for the band. Yes, only one other person showed up for bass guitar on the day, and yes, Vim had screwed their chances of getting him by calling (Pete, was it?) a pretentious wanker just ten seconds into his piece. Still, Vim had long been telling himself (and Colin) that if it hadn’t been for Timothy Grigson’s generosity all those years ago, Colin would never have been allowed to join Bad News in the first place.

 

So of course, when Channel 4 had contacted him in December 1985, Vim realised straight away that they wouldn’t have need of Timothy’s stuff this time around – and therefore, technically, Colin. But he still didn’t argue the case when the producer informed him that to do the reunion they would need all four original members of Bad News. He just didn’t tell Colin, and was extremely amused when he saw the footage of the camera crew finding the unsuspecting little git. Colin really did know how to embarrass himself.

 

 

 

It was nearly two years later, and fifteen months after the Monsters of Rock fiasco, when Colin finally agreed to come over.

 

‘Tim doesn’t have much left anymore, if that’s what you’re wondering,’ said Colin stiffly, when they were seated together in the living room. ‘He sold most of the gear when the band broke up the first time around.’

 

Vim just shrugged.

 

‘How is Tim?’ he asked.

 

‘He’s all right.’

 

‘And your mum and dad?’

 

‘Yes. The same – Thank you.’

 

Vim smiled. Colin couldn’t help but be polite. Proper little posh boy.

 

‘They – ’ Colin began awkwardly. ‘They still ask after you.’

 

Vim felt an unexpected jolt of affection at Colin’s words. He’d always liked Mr and Mrs Grigson. Despite their being desperately upper middle class, hating rock ‘n’ roll, and embodying nearly everything Bad News was supposed to be against, they’d always been supportive. Mr Grigson always insisted on offering the lads a drink if they were in, and Mrs Grigson was always fussing over them. Although Vim was loath to admit it, he knew his own parents would get on with them very well.

 

‘You can tell them I’m good,’ he said. ‘You know - we still have a bit of money left over. We could definitely afford our own system now.’

 

He looked at Colin, only to find him staring at his shoes.

 

‘Spider and Den are well up for it,’ he tried again.

 

‘...I don’t think that’s a very good idea,’ said Colin. ‘I mean – for me. Thanks and everything. You lads can – can go ahead but I’m better off where I am, really.’

 

 

 

2.

 

Colin was very intelligent. Hyper-intelligent, actually.

 

He might have been an idiot; a piss-poor bassist, and a stuck up little snob, but Vim knew how smart he really was. He’d heard him recite small print with a startling grasp of its meaning, and it had gotten them out of some pretty hairy situations in the past.

 

A few times Colin had prevented them from signing their souls away for a blatant rip-off deal. Vim had always yelled and cursed at him over it, but eventually he’d relented. On those occasions. After a couple of years, when he’d been desperate for them to just do _something_ he’d stopped letting Colin see the paperwork. Hence their more recent string of disasters, really.

 

Perhaps that was why Vim had been so taken in by Rick. He looked like Colin, of course. But then there had been all of his right-on, student jargon. His intellect was nothing on Colin’s, but there had still been something about his outrage whenever Vim said something he considered offensive. There was something of the goody two shoes about Rick that was just so... _Colin_.

 

 

 

Settled back onto the sofa together, Vim passed Colin another lager.

 

‘Did you realise the documentary was a set up?’ he asked him.

 

Colin sighed.

 

‘Technically speaking, that contract and everything they did for us was legitimate,’ he said, shaking his head. ‘I was just as taken in by it all as you were.’

 

‘It was pretty exciting, wasn’t it?’

 

‘Yes, it’s a shame.’ Colin looked at him sadly. ‘It really is.’

 

 

 

3.

 

Colin was surprisingly good at managing relationships.

 

Whatever Vim had said about Colin in the past, he wasn’t actually the worst member of the band. Oh, sure – he couldn’t play to save his life. And when he was in one of his moods, lecturing them all on record deals, or demanding to be allowed to sing a number, Vim could just about kill him.

 

But it was actually  _Den_ and his forgetfulness that got under Vim’s skin most of the time. He wasn’t the strongest player, either, and frequently mixed up his chords, or was just so bloody sloppy Vim couldn’t _stand_ it. He could no longer count the number of times they’d had a falling out, and how often _Colin_ had been the one to intervene. Spider was often quite happy to sit back and enjoy the fight, but Colin would always step in and try to reconcile them. It also became a normal thing for Den and Spider to send Colin in to calm Vim down when he was in a rage, if he wouldn’t offer to do so first.

 

Perhaps this was why last year, Vim had tried to keep Den from finding out about the reunion and not Colin. He regretted this now. Den might have been thick as hell – but he was a good bloke. During the band’s hiatus, he’d always been there to give Vim a boot up the arse and keep him working. He was still his mate. Still the first person Vim had approached to join Bad News.

 

And as for Colin... it was just his bad luck that there had never been anyone to step in when he and Vim were fighting. Vim knew he shouldn’t have let the film crew corner Colin as he had, and he certainly shouldn’t have laughed about it with Spider afterwards. No one ever backed Colin up.

 

 

 

The scar across Colin’s throat had healed up nicely, but it was still visible. Seeing it, Vim felt a slight itch race across his scalp in sympathy. His hair had grown back well since the operation; but he was certain the process was already slowing, and it was only just brushing his shoulders. He was a bit concerned that he was starting to look like his dad.

 

Colin’s hair was still being kept short for his bank job, no doubt. It also looked like it was thinning slightly at the front.

 

They hadn’t actually seen each other since the concert. Vim had finally cracked and telephoned Colin back in May. Colin had stopped hanging up on Vim’s calls at the start of July, and they had had a long chat. Since then, they’d been having occasional, slightly awkward catch-ups over the phone, and Vim had been surprised when Colin agreed to come round.

 

‘How’s your throat?’ he asked.

 

Colin bit his lip, looking pained.

 

‘Fine,’ he said. ‘How’s your _head_?’

 

‘Oh, it’s – ’

 

‘Vim I’m so sorry!’ Colin blurted out. ‘I – I mean, when – I _am_ sorry.’

 

‘It’s all right,’ said Vim. ‘I’d have done the same thing. To meself, I mean. Not you.’

 

Colin looked away from him, and Vim shook his head. He suddenly recalled the words that Vyvyan git had said to him back at the hospital.

 

 _‘Oh, I think you’re in with a chance, mate._ _I_ _used to trample Rick a few times a week, didn’t I?’_

 

He deflated. Who was he kidding? He didn’t stand a chance with Colin. The worst member of Bad News was clearly himself.

 

 

 

4.

 

Colin cared about the band. He really did.

 

Yeah, he looked a complete tosser in his leopard print trousers; pulling faces and leaping about the place, but at least he put a bit of energy into his performance. At least he gave a shit, unlike some _other_ band members that came to mind.

 

Den, once again, was the main offender here. Vim had once accused him of still wanting the band to be out of someone’s dad’s garage, and Den had replied, ‘What’s wrong with that?’

 

Vim nearly had a fit.

 

Den seemed to share none of his passion or vision for the band. He just didn’t seem to give a damn. It drove Vim spare. What the hell was wrong with wanting to define them as something _other_ than heavy metal? To just place them as something that little bit different?

 

And then there was _Spider_. Spider, who could usually do no wrong; who had been off his face for the better half of their acquaintance and rarely gave Vim any shit. Spider was just so naturally cool that for the most part it didn’t matter what he said or did. He always looked like a rock star anyway. He made the band look _good_. But even his attitude grated on Vim’s nerves sometimes. Why didn’t he _care_?

 

But Colin, from the off, had dived into things with enthusiasm. He listened intently to Vim’s theories, supported many of Vim’s ideas, and sometimes even helped him find the words he was looking for if he was too pissed to make himself clear. He took Bad News seriously. He pushed hard for record contracts and venue hire deals – Hell, he even stood up to _Vim_ if he thought it was worth it; if it would benefit the band.

 

 

 

‘I’ve got some really good ideas for where we can go from here,’ said Vim, still hopeful. ‘I mean – fuck Steve Richardson. We got the coverage we needed; now people know who we are.’

 

Colin squirmed awkwardly.

 

‘Oh, Vim,’ he said. ‘They’re still referring to the band as “Bad Noose” in some of the papers.’

 

‘Who cares? We’ll correct them. And at least we’re being “referred to”, eh?’

 

 

 

 

5.

  
From the moment Vim first saw Colin, he wanted him.

 

As the years passed he developed an ugly habit of getting drunk and trying to convince Colin to get into bed with him. He wasn’t proud of it, or of his sulks each time Colin turned him down. He didn’t blame him for doing so. Colin would probably want some clean, sensible, uptight, banker-type more like him.

 

Vim knew it was no reason to keep anyone in a band; unfair to the people who could be playing in Colin’s place (although they had no current applicants), unfair to the rest of the band caught in the crossfire, and deeply, deeply unfair to Colin.

 

It had definitely cultivated a more destructive aspect to their relationship; not just with each other but with the rest of the band. He knew it had become an in-joke, but he’d just ignored it, or threatened Den whenever he wasn’t careful enough to keep his thoughts to himself. He might have found the whole ‘Vim might be a queer’ thing funny if it wasn’t so fucking _true_.

 

Spider had repeatedly tried to ward him off; told him what he already knew – that Colin wasn’t interested and he was only causing them both hell. But Vim just hadn’t been able to let Colin go. He’d admired his strengths; liked seeing him in his tight trousers; enjoyed spending time with him. He wanted him close, even now.

 

 

 

‘That bloke – Rick,’ said Colin. ‘Was it serious between you two?’

 

‘Not serious,’ said Vim, feeling his face heat up. ‘But we did see each other for a few months.’

 

‘Right.’

 

‘He reminded me of you, see. I missed you.’

 

Colin gave a kind of half-nod, and Vim cringed. Why had he fucking bothered saying that, he thought? Now he’d probably creeped him out.

 

‘I’m sorry I stood on your head, Al- Vim,’ said Colin, suddenly.

 

Vim blinked.

 

‘You – you can call me Alan,’ he said quietly. ‘Just you. When it’s only us, if you like.’

 

Colin smiled, and Vim continued.

 

‘I’m sorry I hit you – I’m sorry for everything. The name calling and – telling you you can’t play and stuff.’

 

‘I’m not very good, I suppose,’ said Colin, wincing. ‘I watched some of the footage back. You were right.’

 

‘You’re fine. Just out of practice. We could go through some chords together, yeah?’

 

Colin didn’t respond.

 

‘And _you_ were right,’ said Vim finally.

 

‘About what?’ Colin asked, frowning.

 

‘About – about me being a queer. It’s my problem, not yours. Well, not anymore. It shouldn’t have been in the first place. I’m sorry. I’ll stop – you know.’

  

Colin gave a choked laugh at that.

 

‘But it _is_ my problem – ’ he said.

 

‘Oh, God. I’ve fucked you up, haven’t I?’

 

‘Well – yes. But that’s not what I meant. The thing is, Alan – I didn’t think I was queer. But the truth is, I don’t know what I am – because I’ve always liked _you_. Isn’t that ridiculous?’

 

Vim stared at him. Colin _liked_ him?

 

‘But you – you never wanted to shag me,’ he said incredulously.

 

‘That’s not strictly true,’ said Colin. ‘I didn’t want to go off with you and then wake up the next day alone, and find you boasting to the lads about how many girls you’ve been with.’ He looked Vim in the eye. ‘Vim – Alan – everyone _knows_.’

 

Vim sighed, nodding as Colin continued.

 

‘Please don’t think I don’t understand – God, it must have been awful for you. All those years. But you _know_ Spider and Den don’t care. I mean, probably as long as you don’t try anything on with Den, but for heaven’s sake, they were joking about it when _I_ joined! Back then, of course, I thought it _was_ a joke – ’

 

‘Until I tried it on with you after that gig,’ Vim finished for him, swallowing. ‘Look, I don’t know what it would take – for you to come back and – and maybe... But I’ll try really hard to keep calm. I dunno – maybe there’s a class I can go to or something. Or I’ll just hit Den instead.’

 

‘Den would wipe the floor with you, Alan.’

 

‘Yeah, yeah he would.’

 

Colin shuffled up a little closer to him.

 

‘You’re sure this isn’t about Rick?’ he asked, eyes wide. ‘You’ve changed quite a lot since – since the band.’

 

‘Nah. I’ve seen what he’s got with that Vyvyan. I was jealous and I didn’t understand why. But I do now. I’ve seen what they have together. And I – ’

 

Vim looked at Colin.

 

‘Can I buy you a drink some time?’ he asked.

 

‘ – Okay,’ said Colin, smiling. ‘Yes.’

 

 


End file.
